Wednesday, February 25, 2009

A Lesson From Justin Timberlake

February has always been Grammy month. For a music lover like moi, this is a big thing. When I was 14 and smack dab in the middle of my O.G. phase, I'd fire up the old VCR (remember those?), tape the Grammys and watch L.L. Cool J and Run DMC over and over and over again. Ah, good times!
But this year I admit I just wasn't that interested. This could mean I'm getting old, or that the glitz just isn't as impressive without Adidas sweat suits and ginormous gold chains. Yee-ahhh, boyz!
Either way, the day after the broadcast I heard a story from behind the scenes that made me wish I'd paid more attention. A couple hours before the curtain lifted, one of the acts pulled a No Show. The panicked producers began to brainstorm on who could pull off a last minute - Grammy worthy performance. Justin Timberlake had just finished his dress rehearsal when the producer cornered him. Seeing the look of panic on the producers face - before even knowing the problem, Timberlake immediately asked, "What can I do to help?"
Within half an hour, they'd pieced together an all-star duet by the Rev. Al Green and Justin Timberlake, backed up by Boyz II Men with Keith Urban on guitar. Even if you're not a fan of any of these musicians, ya gotta admit, it's a ton of talent for one stage to hold!
In a moment of crisis, when someone steps up to do something that isn't required, we usually call that person a hero. I may not go so far as to call Justin Timberlake a hero, but the producer sure might!
Truthfully, I'm not even real familiar with Justin Timberlake's music (other than "In A Box" from SNL - one of the funniest moments on that show... EVER!)
But, I am a HUGE fan of the, "What can I do to help?" attitude.
The reality is, we're living in some tough times. Some may even call it a crisis. No doubt about it, the economy and all the stress revolving around, well, pretty much everything might make you want to be the one looking to receive help. But here's something I believe is important: If you're feeling vulnerable - stop! Help someone else!
Having the "What can I do to help?" attitude immediately makes one feel prosperous and fortunate. And the help doesn't have to be financial; there are so many ways to offer assistance to another. And when you do, you'll automatically feel a little more stable and secure.
Anyone with any amount of success who is honest will tell you they didn't do it alone. We all need a little help, now and then. When you see another's crisis and step in to offer help, it creates a reciprocal attitude that will come back to help in your moments of need. That's just how the universe works.
Lend a hand. Give a dollar. Share your prosperity. Step in at the last moment to do a duet with Al Green (wouldn't mind doing this myself!) Whatever you can do to help another is assistance that benefits... everyone!
Marcus Engel is a professional speaker/author who inspires audiences to achieve success by making intelligent choices. Blinded by a drunk driver at age 18, Marcus battled through two years of recovery and 300 hours of reconstructive facial surgery to reach his goal of returning to college. After graduating from Missouri State University in 2000, Marcus began sharing his story professionally to audiences nationwide. In 2002, Marcus founded his own publishing company with the release of his autobiography, "After This...An Inspirational Journey For All the Wrong Reasons." His latest book, "The Other End of the Stethoscope" was released October 2006. His messages of empowerment and motivation have been witnessed by hundreds of thousands through his keynotes, his autobiography and his monthly newsletters. Marcus Engel is a speaker, a message, a story you will never forget! Visit http://www.MarcusEngel.com for more information!
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Saturday, February 21, 2009

C'Mon, People!

I’m no fan of B.S., denial and all around entitlement issues. That’s why I’ve been enjoying, “C’Mon, People!” by Bill Cosby so much.

Cosby has caught a lot of flack for calling out African Americans for, what he says, is an attitude which glorifies the negative which, in turn, diminishes the work of MLK, Malcolm X, Harriet Tubman and Fredrick Douglas.

In “C’Mon, People!” he even adds sidebars to chapters called, perfectly, “Call Outs.” These call outs are from well respected, educated individuals who share a montra of personal responsibility, as Cosby does. Here’s a comment from Dr. George McKenna which, I think, summarizes some important points for everyone…forget your race, this is good advice for humanity:

“We have to look at ourselves. We can’t be embarrassed by that, or offended by the one who holds up the mirror. Let’s say, ‘Okay, we know we got some problems. Let’s try to deal with them and stop blaming other folks.’” Now, when we underachieve, we compare ourselves to some other underachievers and celebrate being the best of the pitiful. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the definition of insanity. When you create an alternative reality and believe where you are is normal, you are insane.”

Whatcha think? Have you created your own version of reality? I’m guilty of this in the past, but (I hope), never again. It’s denial, pure and simple…and I choose to live in the real world, not a world I’ve mentally created where I feel more comfortable.

How about you? Have you ever re-written reality, just to make yourself happy? We all know reality can’t REALLY be re-written, but there are sometimes those who, after working really, really hard at it, can choose to view things to their favor-no matter which way reality falls. Those are the people who are infuriating and pathetic at the same time. And ya know? I’ve been one of these people. But after choosing to view reality instead of the pitiful world I’d created, I saw how reality, when looked at straight on, isn’t nearly as intimidating as we usually think it is.

Monday, February 16, 2009

DebeHoffman.com

As I recently posted, my friend (and the sister of my favorite nurse and "After This..." character, Barb DeWalle) Debe Hoffman, was recently diagnosed with leukemia. Her nephew, Mark, fought a long battle with a rare form of cancer and his web site, MarkDewalle.com, was a huge help before, during and after his passing to everyone who loves their family.

Debe is just entering the world of blogging with her own site, so if you'd like to see the first steps of her journey and offer her an encouraging word, you can find her at: www.DebeHoffman.com

Friday, February 13, 2009

Ask, Listen, Learn

A month ago, both computers used to run my business were hit (we think) with a nasty computer virus. While neither Marvelyne nor I is qualified to diagnos this for sure, it's the most likely scenario when two computers, within 10 minutes of one another, have their operating system corrupted.

Even now, a month later, we're still mopping up the mess...and maybe creating a few more along the way. Yesterday, we realized Marvelyne's brand spanking new machine wasn't performing all it's functions. Quite literally, from noon until nearly 11 p.m., she sat in front of the computer, most of the time dealing with tech support. At one point early on, tech support had her do a full system restore (and if you're not geeky, this consists of taking every file, setting, driver, etc. off the hard drive and doing a process where by the machine starts anew.) Should this be necessary on a three week old machine? I think not.

Then, after fighting this battle into the late night, we learn the sad, hard truth...ya know that whole system restore you did about six hours ago? Yeah, that wasn't really necessary. Boom! Six plus hours down the crapper.

And why was this done? Because tech support did not ask questions. Instead, they jumped in at whatever point they could and started to run towards a goal. That's all fine and good, and I empathize with how tough it must be to deal with customers all day long who are always, ALWAYS in a pickle. Still, had more questions been asked before creating a diagnosis of the problem, we could have saved a day's work.

This isn't really an isolated occurrence, as I'm sure you know. It often happens where, without all the facts, someone jumps to conclusions, only to learn later that had they gathered more info, it would have led to a different outcome.

As I go into this coming weekend, one of my biggest goals is to remember to ask questions, gather info and make decisions once I have all the facts. Establishing this as a pattern is one of the things I personally need to work on-a lot! I hope this tech support example will show you, faithful reader, the benefits of asking questions, listening to the answers and, when all info is present, act accordingly.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Taking A Chance On Something You Think You Won't Like

I could very well be the only person on earth who actually likes sardines. Weirdo, I know.

And really, what's to like? You have to open some oddball can, then look down at these little fishy bodies laying there, all stinky and covered in mustard with their little dead fishy bones sticking out of their dead fishy bodies. "Appetizing" is not the word that comes to mind.

But if I eat one of these things...wow! Granted, it's no Bissinger's Chocolate or anything, but it's still tasty!

And ya know how I know sardines are so good? I went against my "better judgement" (i.e. prejudice) and tried one. And the rest, as they say, is history...

Similar thing happened tonight. Whether it's blindness related, or just because I get bored easily, I'm not much of a movie buff. The video description service at our local Regal Cinema has changed my movie experiences for the better, but I'm just a hard sell on flicks. If I can set through the whole thing and it wasn't knock-my-socks-off fantastic, I keep thinking, "There's two hours and $30 I'll never get back."

So, why would I read movie reviews? I wouldn't usually. And why would I listen to radio podcasts of movie shows? Again, typically, I wouldn't.

My fav talk station, 97.1 FM out of STL, has a weekly program called Max On Movies. For someone who doesn't love film, I just pass over this section every time I'm grabbing my Dave Glover Show podcasts. My mistake!

See, I'm headed out on a four night work trip in a few days. Lots of plane time means lots of podcast time. So, figured I'd just stop in the Max On Movies spot and take a gander...man, shocker!

Sure, Max reviews the movies, but he also has a couple interviews with two of my favorite authors; Neil Gaimon and Chuck Palahnuick (did I get that spelling right?)

Both these authors would easily rank on my top 10 of all time favorite authors. Throw in Stephen King, Hunter S. Thompson, Ridley Pearson and Douglas Coupland and we've got a party (especially if Hunter S. Thompson brings the goods from "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas"...which is highly improbable since he's dead. But, I digress...)

So, I downloaded these podcasts and am super, SUPER pumped to get to hear an interview with Neil Gaimon. I just discovered Gaimon's work within the last year or two and, since then, have been reading everything I can get my hands on of his. This is going to make for an especially interesting listen somewhere between here and Albany, or Albany and Wichita.

And who'd have thunk it? Me! Getting something cool out of movie talk! And just think, had I not reached in and grabbed that slimy sardine to learn how good they are, I'd never know the joys of fishy goodness! And if I'd just kept passing over Max on Movies, I wouldn't get the Gaimon interview, either!

Awesome!

Happy Birthday, Carson!

Yep, that's right...it's Carson's 8th birthday!

And what does Carson want to do for his birthday? Well, he started off the morning with a yummy late breakfast (he had a big day at the doggy day spa yesterday, so he wanted to sleep in today.) Then, it was back to his bed for a mid-morning nap. This afternoon, he got extra play time in the yard, lots of extra scratches and he'll get his birthday present (a new Nylabone...but shh! Don't tell!) later tonight!

All fun stuff aside, this 8th birthday of Carson weighs on me a little bit. Yes, it seems just like yesterday that I came home from Jersey with this maniacal black Tazmanian Devil at the end of a harness. Took a little while for us to become a working team, but these days, it's hard to even remember those first years of breaking him in. And every dog lover has to face fact: dogs simply don't live as long as people. The Seeing Eye estimates a guide dog's working life to be 7 to 9 years. Carson is now at 6.5 years and I know his retirement is in the cards (though hopefully not for a few more years) On the whole, the last couple of years has only seen him slow up maybe 10%...and that's not much! Just like all of us, as he ages, I expect to see that more, but I'm pleasantly surprised that now, at the hitting of the big 8, he's still just about as spry andenergetic as when he was 3 or 4. I'll consider myself lucky for having had his presence in my life for the last 6.5 years, and toast Carson to as long of a working relationship as we can have...and then to the happiest (and most deserved) retirement any dog can have (and we'll all cross our fingers that's still several years away)...Happy Birthday, Carson!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Just Some Anonymous Names

I really suck at the whole "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon" game. Could be just because I'm not a big movie buff, or could be because I'd rather concentrate my brain cells on the people I know personally, not those who starred in films with Kevin Bacon.

And yours truly knows a ton, A TON, of people. See, I have this philosophy:

Everyone in the world is a friend until they give me reason to think differently.

Unknown rice farmer in the hills of China? Yep, my friend. Random Ukranian woman I've never met? Friend. Medicine man in Bali? Buddy.

Yet, if you're like me, someone tells you of a tragedy with one of THEIR friends and it doesn't hit home like if I'd know this same person intimately. Sure, everyone says the appropriate things, "I'm sorry" or gives some helpful news, "I'll be praying for you..." but it's not nearly like when you know the person. So, if random Chinese rice farmer suddenly dies and I hear of it, my pain doesn't go terribly deep-even though I consider him a friend, it's not like we're intimate, dig?

But what about when you do know the people? What happens when you ARE intimate? It's a very, very different dynamic.

Right now, I have two people who are getting a lot of my mental, healing and praying energy, Debe and Hilary.

Let's start with Debe. Remember in my book, Barb, my favorite nurse? Wonderful woman who treated me like the 18 year old guy I was, not some anonymous patient. I will always, ALWAYS have a special place in my heart for how Barb took care of me when I couldn't take care of myself. Why did she do such a great job? First off, it's just who she is. But second, Barb had two sons, both around my age.

Notice I used the word "had." In 2007, at age 24, Barb's youngest son succumbed to a rare form of cancer. Devastating for anyone to lose a family member, but a son at such a young age is a bigger kick in the head.

As time has moved on and Barb has begun healing, we learn of another, Barb's sister, Debe. I've met Debe twice; first time at my book release event back in the fall of 06, second time was the day after her nephew, Mark, passed away. Just last week, we learned that Debe was diagnosed with leukemia. I know Debe by default through Barb, but as she (Debe) loves someone I love, it brings everything a step closer.

Now, let's bring it closer than that. Again, a character from my book, Hilary. Hil and I lived in the dorm together, took English classes together at Missouri State and, somewhere over the three years living in New Hall, became the best of friends. Hilary believed in me when I darned sure didn't believe in myself. Her friendship was a constant-something that isn't easy to maintain when you were friends with a guy as emotionally off kilter as I was that first couple of years of blindness. Hilary and I have stayed friends through those college years, post college and while she was in medical school and still, now 15 years later, we still talk a few times per month. Back in October while on my west coast tour, I was pumped to be able to spend the weekend with her at her home in Boise.

Two weeks ago, Hilary called with the news: she'd just been diagnosed with breast cancer. She's 33. You'd think with as many people as I know, I'd be a lot more likely to have lost a lot of friends-not so. Thankfully, other than older relatives, I've lost very few friends. When my BFF tells me she's got a cancer diagnosis, it causes me to take a good, long look at life and how fragile it really is. Nothing makes someone view their own mortality like a friend being diagnosed with something awful.

Well, good news on the Hilary front. The lumpectomy was performed yesterday, the cancer had not gotten into any lymph nodes and she should be released from the hospital in, oh, about five hours. As far as cancer goes, this is about the best case scenario.

So, back to the idea of anonymous names...chances are, you don't know Debe. Or Barb. Or Hilary. I do. They're my friends, not just a random name.

Although you may not know them, I'm asking for you to do them a favor. Hell, do ME a favor: If you're the praying kind, pray for them. If you're the meditating kind, throw some healing energies their way. If you're the athiest kind, hope for modern medicine to do it's thang and keep these people safe. They may be anonymous names to you, but to me, they're friends...

Monday, February 09, 2009

Because They Don't Have To...

As you may read on EE blog, I'm a Shriner. Funny hats, little cars, good times and a whole, WHOLE lot of love and financial support for the Shriners Hospitals for children.

At every stated meeting, different clubs within the Shrine present checks to help out the hospitals (for kids with orthapedic injuries, birth defects or burns, Shriners Hospitals offer free care. Like, totally free-even transportation).

At this past meeting, a club got up and presented a check from a fundraiser...for nearly $10,000. That's five figures, folks! And that was just one presentation but, by far, the largest I've seen since becoming a Shriner a year ago.

Following the $10K presentation, another fellow stood up to make a check presentation, this one for $50. That's $50, no extra zeros at the end. Looked kinda paltry after the $10K check presentation.

But then, we got to hear the story...

There's a little hole-in-the-wall bar and grill near the Shrine Club building in Sanford, Florida. After some of the meetings, Shriners will stop in for a libation or two. They've gotten to know the owner and the wait staff and, as Shriners usually are, they're generous with tips.

Completely on their own, with no Shriner involvement whatsoever, this bar decided to do a little fundraiser during the Superbowl. During that fundraiser, they came up with $50. That check was passed along to our stated meeting and went right into the transportation fund.

When you get the story, it makes that $50 seem a lot, lot bigger. Why? Because the bar didn't have to do that. They have no obligation to raise funds for any chairity, much less for ours. They're not founded around a mission of philanthropy-they're just a bar. And they didn't have to do anything...they just wanted to.

And that, faithful reader, is the kind of donation that makes $10K donations seem a little less grand...and $50 to seem a whole, whole lot more valueable.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Is Marcus MIA?

Well, yeah, sorta. I'm fine, just been ridiculously swamped. During the first real work week of the new year, within 10 minutes, both my computer AND Marvelyne's computer were hit with a massive computer virus. Bam! No windows, no working machines-nothing. Even now, weeks later, we're still trying to mop up the mess. This caused a purchase of a new machine for each of us, but mine hasn't even arrived. Moving into a new machine, new OS and new JAWS software could mean I'll continue to be MIA for a bit...but cross your fingers it all works out okay.

Secondly, mE's mother had surgery and that same week, my parents arrived into town to start their snowbird vacation. We were hopping for a few days, but it's so good to have family visit at any time.

Thirdly (is that a word?), it's just been life in general. Early last week, I spoke at Detroit Country Day School and, if the 200 new Facebook friends is any indication, the students had as good of a time as I! Pics to come as soon as our computer systems get a little more established.

And now? Here I sit, on my couch, feet up with a remote in hand, ready to watch the Superbowl! Actually, I could care less about who's playing the game-I just want to see The Boss do his thang!

With Tom Petty last year, and Springsteen this year, I'm glad to see the NFL getting rock icons to perform the halftime show...the days of Brittany Spears out there wearing a sock on her arm are over...and should stay that way. So, bring on the Boss!